29 | Longing for Motherhood: Ruth’s Journey Through Infertility


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Ruth Clayton is an ordained Presbyterian pastor and a hospital chaplain. Her professional life is spent providing comfort, wisdom, and spiritual support to those experiencing the failure of their bodies, those who are dying.

For the past two years, Ruth and her husband, David, have been longing to become parents. In the midst of joyful anticipation, Ruth has had to confront the possible limits of her own body. After months of charting cycles and temperatures, Ruth and David entered the world of medical infertility intervention.

In our conversation, we discuss the ups and downs of the trying, hoping, waiting process. Ruth reflects on what is happening in her soul and her marriage as she looks toward the possibility of motherhood. She is also honest about the low points and how she copes with the monthly disappointments of negative pregnancy tests.

It is an open conversation about an experience that is deeply painful and increasingly common.

7 Responses to “29 | Longing for Motherhood: Ruth’s Journey Through Infertility”

  1. Rosemary Erickson says:

    Ruth, of course I’ve never asked….but have wondered constantly why I was not seeing a joyful pregnancy announced. Thank you for being courageous and sharing this difficult time you are experiencing. Now I can pray specifically for you and David….and for the possibility of a sweet child to fulfill your dreams. Fortunately, we know that God is in charge of every bit of your body…He knows what is best. But….intense prayers will start immediately. Can you feel my loving hugs? They are on the way to surround you.

  2. Brenda Mitchell says:

    Ruthie and David-our prayers are with you as you go through this challenging time-we love you-thanks for sharing so we can pray specifically!

  3. Candice says:

    Hi Ruth! I am praying for you and your husband! I understand every feeling you have and my heart goes out to you. My husband and I have been “trying” since the day we got married… 4 years ago. We have recently reached out to a fertility specialist in our area, and we are praying that this is God’s will for us. In the midst of one of my heart wrenching breakdowns, I came across a book called “When Empty Arms Become A Heavy Burden” (on Amazon). It is a Christian based book with scriptures (which I’m positive you already know), that relate to each topic. It has definitely helped to ease my heartache and mend what I’ve lost in my marriage. It’s helped to redirect my heart and my efforts. I pray that God will send you the baby you long for, in whichever way He decides!

    • Ruth says:

      Candice, thank you so much for your comment. I deeply appreciate your words and the book suggestion. I will be praying for you and your husband as well. May God grant us both the desires of our hearts and the ability to accept what comes or doesn’t come. Be strong and courageous, my sister! —Ruth

  4. Elizabeth says:


    I feel your pain.My husband and I have been trying to start a family for 6 years now with no success with 3 IUI and 1 IVF failed fertility treatment and one miscarriage three and a half weeks ago. I just keep the FAITH. We will try one more time in 9 weeks if that dose not work will be done with the fertility.

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